As I explained somewhat in my previous entry, I spent half a month in the province with my family. In those 2 and a half weeks, I was able to experience what it (in some way) felt like to be a mother, or at least what it felt like to be in-charge of someone/group. Living in my aunt’s house, I was tasked with the responsibility of taking care of my 5-year old cousin (who by the way considers me her favorite “achi” – a hokkien term for older sister/relative).
In those 2 weeks, my 5-year old cousin stuck to me like a gecko. She’d always rush into my room in the morning, and whether or not I was asleep, she’d switch the telly on and watch. Not only that, but she loved to lie under my bed, or under my bedside table while watching, which woke me up from my sleep in countless instances. At night, after we’d have dinner, the first room she’d usually rush into was my room, where she’d stay to watch telly till her mom or dad called her up for bed. After lunch, during the normal “siesta” (afternoon nap) hours, my room was also a place where she usually rushed into, even if I’m watching my own show, or trying to sleep, or reading a good book. It was only then that I realized, if I was a mom, I’d probably encounter the same things with my growing child, which is what I usually did with my own parents when I was growing up.
On our trip to Lake Balinsasayao, I was assigned to another car for the trip to the Lake and my cousin almost threw a fit when she found out I wouldn’t be in the car with her. It was touching, actually. At the gate to the lake entrance, my cousin ran out of her car and took my hand in hers. She made me carry her around, help her to climb on the big rocks, and eventually even to do her business. When I mentioned to her mom that she had to go to the restroom, my aunt told me this was a good opportunity to practice and gave me a packet of tissue. Great really.
In those weeks with my cousin, I realized how touching and frustrating it is to be a mother. If there was one thing I learned (that I had not already known before), it is that there are many difficulties and restrictions and responsibilities that come with being a mother, which is why I should live my single young life to the fullest before I get married and have children. Marriage and children should not be something I should rush into. Being a mother may be a wonderful thing, but to have to be responsible for a baby (and even a cousin) can be a tiring thing which I’m not totally prepared for. Those 2 weeks were a long two weeks, and I’m far from being too old to be a mother. Being young is something I should enjoy, and being under the care of someone else is a wonderful thing while it lasts.